Tenderfoot Diaries

I’ve always been an advocate of the indoor voice.

Mostly that was because of constraints of the various jobs I’ve had.  In a lot of ways it has almost become second nature to keep my opinions to myself.  On the Hunt Smart Think Safety Blog, I wrote on behalf of a company.  If I’d spouted off what I really thought about certain issues, I could have negatively impacted the company image, which wouldn’t have been good for the company, or have provided good service to the people who signed my paycheck.   It was easier to just stay neutral and to try to write about the issues that mattered in a relatively noncontroversial way.

When it comes to the Outdoor Bloggers Summit I speak to and sometimes on behalf of 200+ different bloggers.  Almost anything I say that has even a whiff of controversy is probably going to offend or annoy someone.  So, as in my corporate life, it is easier to steer a middle course and not say anything that might really reveal what I think or how I feel regarding certain issues.  It is just simpler that way.

When you write for a company or organization and people read and respond or give weight to what you write, you chalk it up to the fact that you’re writing for a company or organization.  Doing that sort of thing gives you a certain amount of gravitas, even if it is only in your own mind.  It also gives you a certain sense of responsibility.  Someone or some group is giving you a platform and allowing you to speak on their behalf.  You have a duty to represent that company or group in a responsible and proper manner.   It isn’t really a matter of speaking softly and carrying a big stick, it’s more speaking softly and carrying no stick at all.  Creating controversy is the last thing you want.

When I finally got an outdoor blog that was just mine I thought I would be bursting at the seams with opinions.  I could finally say all the stuff I hadn’t said, and express all the opinions I’d left unexpressed for so long.  There are a lot of things I want to say, but now that I could say them, I’m not sure I should say them.   Learning to use my outdoor voice is proving harder than I thought.

I suppose, in the end, all I can do is say what I think and what I feel and let the chips fall where they may.  While I will never be a fan of controversy, I do believe that civilized debate is still possible and can be achieved.  I also think that people should stand up for what they believe and what they know to be right.  I have a platform, and an audience who is willing to listen to what I say, and I still have a responsibility, even if it is only to myself.

I’m lucky enough to have an outdoor voice.

Now I just have to learn to use it.

I have to admit, I’m a bit of a Daddy’s girl.  It seems kind of an odd thing to say given that the “Daddy” in question didn’t come into my life until I was 21 and didn’t marry my Mom until a few years after that, but being odd doesn’t make it any less true.   My Dad and I aren’t related by biological ties, our ties are ones of love and support and standing by each other through some very tough times.   I can’t think of a man I admire more, so it stands to reason I’d want to be like him, in as much as that’s possible.

I’ve always been a indoor girl.  My maternal grandmother exposed me to nature, and both sets of  grandparents took me fishing and made me work in the garden.  My biological Dad made me take walks and ride my bike while he ran, but I never found that much fun, in fact I saw it more as a punishment.  I wanted to be inside where I could read and write and dream.  Outside there was bugs and sun and it was either too hot or too cold.  Inside just seemed easier.

Up until my Dad came along, I’d never really known anyone who hunted or fished with the passion that he had.  He loved all things outdoors.  He skied and road dirt bikes.  He liked snowmobiling and had a Harley.  He had award winning fish mounted and hung on his walls, and an antelope ( I think) mount that my sister and I named Ralph.  Dad is a life member of the NRA, a member of countless fishing and hunting clubs and an ardent supporter of conservation efforts.  He loves Alaska and British Columbia and takes long trips to fish and hunt.  His life was one I’d never experienced, but I quickly saw the attraction.

Under Dad’s influence I started to see things in a new light.  I’d always enjoyed fishing, but fishing was more fun with him.   He did more than encourage me to drop my line in the water, he taught me how to fish.   He was also proud of my efforts and patient with me when I hooked the same pile of brush for the 34th time.   I felt he was happy to be sharing something he loved with his daughter,  a trait he’s also extended to his nephews, his grandchildren and the children of friends.  He loves to share what he knows, and his enthusiasm for teaching is infectious.

Thanks to Dad I also began to see that hunters were more than just guys with guns who shot Bambi.  I’d always been an apathetic hunting supporter, but Dad was one of the people who taught me that hunters did a lot of good.  He was always picking up trash on his land or by the rivers where he fished.  He cared about keeping the land pristine and about maintaining habitat for the animals who lived on that land.  Dad was as struck as anyone else by the beauty of an animal in it’s natural habitat, but he wasn’t sentimental.   The deer that he admired in July could easily become a venison steak in November, that was just part of the cycle of life.

The best thing about Dad and probably the thing I owe him for the most is that he made being outdoors a fun, no pressure experience.  If I wanted to go I went.  If I didn’t wish to go I didn’t.  If I did go, we laughed and I learned and we had a good time.  The picture at the top of this post is from one of our last trips to the U.P.  Dad had the distinction of catching both the biggest and the smallest fish that day.  I love this picture because of the sense of mischief on his face.  He’s laughing at himself and enjoying the outdoors and that’s the best outdoor role model a girl could want.

I have to confess I’ve wanted an outdoor blog of my own for quite some time now.  Over the past three years I’ve written a lot of posts on outdoor subjects, written for two outdoor blogs and never had the chance to say what I really thought unfettered by concerns about my opinions reflecting negatively on a company or an organization.  Speaking or writing on behalf of someone or something else is harder than it looks and there are occasions when all you can do is bite your tongue and avoid a subject that is just too controversial.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining about the outdoor writing that I’ve done in the past.  Had it not been for my corporate outdoor writing job I probably never would have started writing about the outdoors at all.  That job also led to my meeting the people who eventually helped found the Outdoor Bloggers Summit.  Writing for, and running, that organization has been a privilege and a pleasure, but it has had its constraints.  When I write for that blog, I’m writing as the head of the organization, not as myself.  What I say there can have an impact on a lot more than just me.

In the end, I realized I needed a place where the only one I spoke for was myself, and the Tenderfoot Diaries was born.

Those of you who have read my writing in the past probably think you know what you can expect here and, in part, you’re probably right.  I will encourage outdoor blogging and seek to educate outdoor bloggers, just as I do on the OBS blog.  I may resurrect Safety Friday, which began on the corporate blog I wrote.   Hopefully I’ll keep to the standard of writing that you’ve come to expect from me.  I certainly intend to try.

The part that will be new, and which you may not have seen before, is my opinions.  I have a lot of them, and some of them may surprise some of you.  I’ll also be telling you about my outdoor adventures, both the triumphs and the screw-ups.  There may even, if I get over my camera phobia, be pictures. The main thing I promise is that I will always tell you the truth, and I’ll always strive to be honest and fair in what I write.

Right now, I’m not exactly sure what this blog will turn out to be, and I’m finding that rather exciting.  For the first time I have an outlet for writing about the outdoors that has no other purpose than what I want it to have.  That’s quite an exhilarating prospect.

I can’t wait to see what comes next.